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The 2016 10 Demandments
by: God (as told to his humble servant John Holler)
Editor's Note: Below you will find THREE of the TEN Fantasy Demandments for 2016 (they change every year). If you'd like to read all ten, please click HERE to order our 2016 Pre-Season Draft Guide.
“In the beginning, he that is God created fantasy football. He looked and said it was good.” Genesis 17:52
many years, God has opted to use as his vessel one of his less-than-praiseworthy
servants to dispense His good word of the kingdom. Two millennia earlier,
he had a follower named Moses (known as Cool Mo downtown) to which
he gave His Ten Commandments. To varying extents, those guidelines
are followed or ignored at near-whim by his alleged followers.
His Demandments take on a completely different form. They are all
to be strictly adhered to. People get into heaven even for the occasional
wife-coveting, but to ignore a Demandment is to do so at your own
peril. Some Demandments maintain a theme. Others are specific to the
current landscape of the NFL. This is His word. Follow as you see
fit, but keep in mind that faith without works is dead.
The First Demandment
Thou Shalt Adhere to the Good Book – It amazes Him how often his sheep fail to fully understand the construct of the league they play in. While many fantasy leagues have essentially the same set of basic rules – six points for a touchdown, specific points for passing touchdowns, etc. – there are just as many rules unique to a specific league. Most leagues have a full printout of their league rules that are available that may be unique and potentially troublesome. When is the trade deadline? What positions must a roster consist of? Do you need to play two running backs? Can an owner trade future draft picks for live bodies now? Is there an appellate process among all owners when a trade looks intentionally lopsided? Is there protocol in place for how and when waiver claims are made? All of these (and more) have happened in leagues at one point or another and, when they have, typically a rule is put in place to come up with an ordinance to deal with them. The difference between leagues that require two running backs in a lineup or a tight end specific can greatly change one’s draft strategy and impact a roster greatly. It likely takes no more than five minutes to familiarize yourself with the rules, but the consequences of knowing all rules coming can be an invaluable tool for you
Thou Shalt Protect the Chosen One – In previous years, He hasn’t always been in favor of handcuffing a star running back with his backup. But, heading into the 2016 season, there appears to be a unique set of circumstances surrounding the top 20 or so running backs. Guys like Adrian Peterson and Matt Forte aren’t getting any younger. Guys like Le’Veon Bell and Jamaal Charles are coming off significant injuries. Guys like Todd Gurley, David Johnson, Devonta Freeman and Ezekiel Elliott haven’t proved they can be 16-game featured backs yet. As a result, many players who will be going in the first or early-second round will be selected with fingers crossed that they can stay healthy. When you look at the average last running back on a roster – either a fourth or fifth RB – how often does that player realistically play? Fantasy owners are notorious for playing essentially the same roster week after week barring injuries or bye week concerns. If you are going to take a running back who you aren’t likely to play, given the relative uncertainty of many of the top backs and the potential for some significant time share situations (Jeremy Hill/Giovani Bernard, T.J. Yeldon/Chris Ivory, etc.) by taking either both members of a tag team or the backup to your top pick, you assure yourself of having a fantasy starter regardless of whether the top dog gets injured. This is especially true in 2016, where it seems to be more questions than answers at running back.
Thou Shalt Seek Out All Tribes of the Earth – Often times, when a fantasy owner is stacking his or her draft board, there is a tendency to place a lot of emphasis on several players from the same team. If that owners sticks loyally to the board, they can end up with three or more primary starters from the same team. Some owners subscribe to that theory, but, in many ways, it is the recipe for playoff disaster. Even in 2007, when owners that had a slew of Patriots rolled through their divisions, when the Patriots had one misstep in the playoffs, they got bounced. The same thing happened a couple of years ago when the Broncos were flying high until a Thursday night game at San Diego and all off the huge numbers put up throughout the season, meant nothing in the playoffs and the favorite got bounced. There is something to be said about, let’s say, having a QB and a kicker because if one fails, the other tends to have more opportunities, but the best bet is to diversify and give yourself as many options as possible on a week to week basis to find matchups to exploit.
He dispenses His advice with the intention of his words being obeyed. It’s up to you to determine how much heed you want to pay to His Word, but He offers them with love and the best of intentions and knows how you’re going to decide on His Demandments anyway. Good luck to all of you in 2016. He has smiled upon you. Now it’s up to you to determine how much value you give to His gospel.